What Alcohol Does to Your Body: Harvard’s Dr. Sarah Wakeman With the Medical Facts You Need to Know

Mel Robbins (19:24):

And

Dr. Wakeman (19:25):

For most people, because of the tremendous stigma around substance use disorder, there's a lot of shame and worry for many people, their experience has not been that good things happen to them when they share that they're having a problem with alcohol or other drugs. And so as a doctor, I feel like it's on me to earn someone's trust and also to educate them. I mean, there's nothing more heartbreaking to me than when I see someone in the terminal stages of liver failure, for example, from alcohol. And no one has told them beforehand what the risks are that this could happen, what sort of lower risk drinking looks like. They've often never had that conversation. So we'll see people in their thirties come in, they literally die during that hospital admission and you look back and they had touch points with doctors, they maybe were drinking heavily and no one stopped to sort of talk to them about it. And I think that is a real testament to how in the medical system for so long, we have seen substance use and addiction as something separate from the rest of healthcare, as sort of not our job or

(20:23):

A behavioral issue or a moral issue or a willpower issue. But this is a health condition like any other. And I think the medical system and doctors need to get comfortable talking to patients about it, asking them the right questions, giving them the right education and partnering with people around making healthy changes.

Yeah, that's a great question. So I'll run through the checklist that I'm thinking when I'm talking to someone about alcohol. So first, understanding how much they're drinking, just the general quantity and how frequently is important as sort of a proxy for what their risk might be. But then the really important questions, are they drinking more than they want to? So they may have set an intention for themselves and they're finding they're actually always drinking more or spending more time on drinking or recovering from drinking than they intended had they tried to make changes and not been able to. So if you tried to cut back or tried to stop and you actually weren't able to, that's a really important sign that you may have lost control of your drinking. Are you drinking despite the fact that people in your life are worried about it or your spouse has expressed concern or it's impacting your work or your ability to function in roles that matter to you?

(21:40):

Are you drinking despite the fact that it actually makes you more anxious or it's worsening your mental or physical health in some way? And then we often think about craving, which is sort of a strong psychological urge to want to drink. So you can't get the idea of having a drink out of your mind. That's something that we can see with alcohol use disorder. And then there are two physical symptoms, which is that idea of do you need to drink more to get the same effects and you need to drink four drinks now, whereas before one or two would give you that effect and do you feel sick if you stop drinking? So that's sort of the checklist we run through and I think really gets at those kind of general areas of losing control, using compulsively, using despite consequences, and then craving

Mel Robbins (22:16):

That was so helpful. And one of the things that really resonated with me is that you've tried to quit. You drink more than you want, you feel anxious, and yet you continue to do it and you're in this cycle of wishing you could get control over this and yet feeling like you can't. And yet if you aren't stumbling around at night or you feel like I am able to carry on a conversation, I'm not blacking out, I'm not getting behind the wheel of a car. There's this assumption that it is under control, but I love how you just defined it because you're making us really look at ourselves and ask ourselves the honest question, which is it really? And even just that question, are you drinking more than you want to be drinking? If you answer that question honestly, and whether you're listening right now for yourself or you're listening for somebody that you love, that you're concerned about, this is an amazing starting point because we're not bickering about how much you're drinking, we're not bickering about your behavior. We're really talking about the honest answer to what is your relationship to it and do you actually have control over your ability to use it or not use it? And that is powerful. Now, Dr. Wakeman, where I want to pivot to next is I'm starting to see this picture where as a researcher and a renowned expert on this topic that you are talking about kind of the big risks that can happen. I want to a little bit on amplifying the day to day impact

(23:51):

That most of us are not present to,

(23:55):

That we reach for the alcohol at night because at least in my own experience, it's like an easy lever to pull to say to my brain, we're no longer working. This is the thing that I do as my ritual to move into the evening to have a glass of wine, but we don't really understand what's happening and how it's actually impacting your experience of your life day to day. I want to take a quick pause so we can hear a word from our sponsors, and I also want to remind you that if you're worried about somebody, send them this episode right now as you're listening to our sponsors, because oftentimes they can't hear it from you. But hearing it from somebody like Dr. Wakeman who has such a balanced approach and is a renowned expert on this topic, it might actually just be the thing that gets somebody to wake up and want to do better.

(24:42):

So I'll be waiting for you after a short word from our sponsors. Thank you for sharing this with anybody who needs to hear it, and I'll see you right after the break. Welcome back, I'm Mel Robbins and I'm so glad you're here. Thank you. Thank you for sharing this episode with absolutely anybody in your life that you believe needs to hear this. You and I are spending time today with Harvard's Dr. Sarah Wakeman. So Dr. Wakeman, can you explain to us what are some of the other day-to-day things that people experience when they drink that they might not realize is related to drinking?

Mel Robbins (25:51):

What are some of the benefits that you would experience almost immediately if you quit drinking entirely or you cut way back, what kind of health benefit would you experience in your day-to-day life?

Dr. Wakeman (26:04):

Yeah, you'll see a lot of really quick things. So one, you'll sleep better and feel more restored. You may lose weight. There's a lot of calories and alcohol, so if your goal is to lose weight, your drinking a ton of liquid calories, so you may find that that's better. You may find that your exercise capacity goes up resting more and you're not having hangovers and you're able to exercise in a way that feels different. You may find that you're less irritable and more present for your loved ones, that your mood is actually better over time, your skin might look better, you're less dehydrated, your hormones are more regulated, so you may have less acne. So all of those benefits you can often see in a very short time, and that can be reinforcing as you decide what you want your long-term goals to look like, to really see what life is like with less or without alcohol.

Mel Robbins (26:44):

How does alcohol impact the range of women's hormones from estrogen to progesterone to all of it? How does it impact your hormones?

Dr. Wakeman (26:54):

Yeah, this is I think an area of growing research and understanding, and I think people are really interested in sort of drinking during menopause as well, and what to think about all of that. 

Mel Robbins (27:12):

Really?

Dr. Wakeman (27:13):

Yes, because alcohol dilates your blood vessels. So you may have experienced, if you drink a couple glass of wine, you actually feel flushed and

Mel Robbins (27:19):

Feel

Dr. Wakeman (27:19):

Warm. Well, it's just going to amplify the experience you're having during hot flashes. So if you're trying to not have hot flashes, drinking is going to be your enemy in that it's just going to make that worse. Same things like sleep disturbance are really common in menopause. Mood changes and alcohol may impact all of those, and it can be a tough cycle. You may be drinking because your mood's actually low and you're having a hard time falling asleep, but then alcohol is actually running counterproductive and making those symptoms worse over the long haul.

Mel Robbins (27:43):

Let's talk a little bit about sleep because doesn't alcohol impact your sleep in a very negative way?

Dr. Wakeman (27:50):

And people may be surprised to hear that it makes you fall asleep quicker. So often people are like, oh, alcohol helps me sleep. I fall asleep so quickly. But when we think about sleep architecture, there's different cycles to sleep. People are probably familiar with REM sleep is that deep rapid eye movement sleep, but there's different cycles that your body, your brain naturally cycles through in the night. And the balance of those cycles is really important to get restorative sleep, which is when your body rests and heals. And what alcohol does is it changes the makeup of those cycles. So you go more quickly into deep sleep and you have less time in sort of the normal phases of sleep. And so your sleep architecture is disrupted and you don't get that same restful sleep. So you may wake up at two in the morning after you've fallen asleep really quickly, but then you wake up and can't fall back asleep. Or you may wake up in the morning and just feel not refreshed even though you were completely asleep very deeply because your brain is not having the time to restore itself the way that it needs to.

Mel Robbins (28:44):

I have another question, Dr. Wakeman. Can you walk us through what's happening in your body in terms of what we call a hangover? So you've had your night out, you've had a bit of alcohol and you wake up. What is a hangover and what is actually happening in the body as you withdraw from the alcohol?

Mel Robbins (30:22):

Why is anxiety one of the biggest kind of symptoms of a hangover? An alcohol withdrawal?

Dr. Wakeman (30:29):

Yeah, it's probably the effect of these byproducts that then are still impacting the way your body functions your brain, and it takes a long time for your body to excrete them. And so we can see just feeling that really anxious, restless, gross feeling afterwards.

Mel Robbins (30:44):

Does alcohol impact cortisol or any of the other hormones that are in your brain that are playing a part in anxiety?

Dr. Wakeman (30:53):

Yeah, it does, especially over time. And so what we see when people have been drinking over a long time is actually your body starts to adjust because our bodies are very adaptable. So if your body's used to having three or four drinks every night, your body's going to start to accommodate to that. And so what we see is actually changes in the brain. So you see changes in the amount of receptors you have, the amount of hormones you have, your dopamine levels, your stress hormone levels, so your brain is actually adapting to the effects of alcohol. So one thing you may see is that you actually don't get the same effect. So it used to be that two glasses of wine made you feel a certain way and now you need three or four to feel the same way. That's a concept called tolerance, that your body is adapting to having that alcohol around all the time and your brain's actually changing. The reverse of that is if all of a sudden you stop drinking, you're going to feel all out of sorts. You're going to feel shaky, you may have a headache, you may feel anxious, you may feel nauseous, and that's because your body's gotten so adapted to always having alcohol on board that it takes time actually for those changes to reset.

Mel Robbins (31:52):

When you really stop and think about the roller coaster, you're putting your brain and your hormones and your body through it does make you pause. And that's what I wanted to do with this conversation is to make you stop and think about what's actually happening and the reasons why you reach for it. Can you talk a little bit about, for anybody that's taking prescription drugs for anxiety or depression, the impact that alcohol can have?

Mel Robbins (33:22):

Wow. How does alcohol compromise your memory?

Mel Robbins (34:24):

What do you see when you look at a brain where somebody's been a heavy drinker versus somebody that's occasional or very light?

Dr. Wakeman (34:31):

We actually see brain damage on people who've had chronic heavy alcohol use over many years. So if you take a picture of the brain with a CAT scan or with an MRI, what we describe it as is volume loss. So normally you want to see a big, healthy, robust brain, and as you age and with types of dementia, one thing that we see is the brain starts to shrink. So the actual functional parts of the brain are smaller. We see that process accelerated with heavy alcohol use. So often take someone who's in their fifties who really shouldn't have volume loss of their brain at that age, but if they've been using alcohol at a very heavy amount for a long time, we'll often see their brain looks like a much older brain because of that shrinking. And then there are very extreme examples like this rare memory condition where we literally see that part of the brain almost die. You can see it light up that it's been severely impacted.

Mel Robbins (35:19):

That's scary.

Dr. Wakeman (35:20):

It is really scary.

Mel Robbins (35:23):

We have so many listeners around the world who flooded us with questions when we told them that you were going to be here, and a lot of them are about how to deal with somebody that they love and they're drinking.

(35:36):

And so I really want to hear your advice about what specific things you should do and what mistakes we need to avoid when there is somebody in our lives that we're concerned about. How do you approach this? What's the best way to bring it up? What is the worst? And by the way, I want to remind you that if you're thinking about somebody in your life while the sponsors are talking to you, please share this episode. Let Dr. Wakeman talk to your loved one. It could be a life-changing gift for them to hear this. So thank you in advance for being generous with sharing this with people that you love. And I'll be waiting for you with Dr. Wakeman after a short break. Welcome back, I'm l Robbins and you and I are here today with Harvard's Dr. Sarah Wakeman. Dr. Wakeman, I'd love to get your counsel on what you would recommend to somebody if your spouse doesn't think they have a drinking problem, but it's a problem for you.

Dr. Wakeman (36:30):

Yeah, I think these are such important questions, and one of the greatest tragedies to me around substance use disorder is often family members and the general public have been fed the wrong thing to do. And so I think it's a great thing to talk about. First, it's important to define sort of what is an alcohol use disorder, sort of what we're getting at. There's heavy drinking where we're worried about the long-term health effects, and then there is where alcohol has become a problem in your life. And really the definition of an alcohol use disorder is losing control over your drinking compulsive use of alcohol and using despite consequences. So if you are continuing to drink despite the fact that your partner has shared that they're really worried about you or you've started to have problems at work because calling out sick or you're continuing to drink despite health problems related to it, so your doctor says, you know what?

(37:16):

Your liver tests are elevated, you really need to cut back on drinking and you continue to drink. Those are all signs that alcohol started to play a different role in your life. About 15% of the population will have an alcohol use disorder in their life. So this is a very common health condition, more common than many other conditions. We see the great news is that it's entirely treatable. Most people will get well. I think we often have in our minds that this is a terrible stigmatizing recalcitrant condition that no one ever gets better from. That is not true. And that notion that this...

(38:07):

And that becomes really important because when it comes to addiction, it really doesn't matter at all why I think someone should make changes to their alcohol use. The only thing that matters is they think their life will get better in some way. And so really starting to sort of untangle what are this person's goals and how is alcohol getting in the way of them reaching it? That becomes the work. And a partner can be a wonderful mirror for that. I know you're working towards a promotion at work and you mentioned that you had to call it sick twice this week and your boss is frustrated at you. What do you think about that? So really exploring it and ultimately you're sort of empowering the person to feel like they can make a change and that you're supporting them, but you're not forcing it on them, which is often what people feel caught up in having to do.

Mel Robbins (38:47):

What is the mistake that you see people making?

Dr. Wakeman (38:49):

I think people have heard these notions of tough love, enabling, hitting bottom. Those are probably the biggest fallacies. So for people who aren't familiar with those concepts, the idea that tough love is that you really should make things hard on a person that if consequences pile up, the person will ultimately get better. Enabling is the idea if that you're kind or caring to someone that you're actually hurting them in some way. And hitting bottom is this idea that people have to just fall so far and suffer some terrible consequence before they make a change. Those are all really problematic concepts for a couple reasons. So first of all, the definition of alcohol use disorder is not being able to stop despite bad things happening to you. And many people are drinking because it's a powerful coping mechanism and some of the things that put you at risk for an alcohol use disorder, traumatic life experiences, untreated anxiety and depression, not feeling good about yourself.

(39:37):

So having the only people that you love and trust in your life try to cut you down to size and tell you that you're doing something terrible and set some ultimatum is actually not going to help you get well. None of us make hard changes when we feel threatened or punished or not supported. We do it when we feel loved and safe and have hope that our life could be better. And so as a loved one, that's probably the greatest gift you can give to the person. Now it's complicated because you're impacted by their behavior.

Mel Robbins (40:03):

So

Dr. Wakeman (40:04):

It's very easy as a provider. One of the things I love about doing this work, because I've been on the other side and had family members and it's a different experience as a doctor, whether or not my patient continues to drink doesn't impact me personally. I can just be their partner, their champion, work with them for families. There are times where the behavior becomes so unsafe that people have to keep themselves safe and set boundaries, and that's okay. I think the distinction there is that it's not doing it for the person's benefit. So if you kick someone out of your house, it's not going to necessarily help them get better, but there may come a time and a place where people need to do that for their own emotional safety or wellbeing, but for that human being to help someone get well, and this is where earlier conversations are so important, is to really sort of love and support them and work together on it and make sure they find access to good treatment, which is out there and available.

Mel Robbins (40:53):

I want to kind of just hover on this point that if somebody is reaching for alcohol and it's become a coping mechanism for dealing with stress or dealing with a health issue or mental health issue or whatever, insecurity, it's terrifying to give up the coping mechanism. And what do you see when it comes to that psychology of your somebody whose family is like, you have a problem and we're worried about you, and yet it keeps on going. How does shame or that fear that you have of, well, I can't actually get through if I don't have the alcohol or it is just easier, and what's the problem with having a glass of wine or two a night?

Dr. Wakeman (41:42):

Yeah, so many important pieces in there. I think there's so much stigma in our society about alcohol use disorder and substance use disorder, and people rightfully so feel really ashamed and secretive and sometimes long after they've started to worry about themselves, they're scared to tell anyone else because they think someone will judge them or treat them poorly. 

(42:27):

And in fact, it should be hard. That's often these ideas of tough love and hitting bottom is like, well, you have done something bad and you don't have willpower, so we're going to make it tough on you when in fact, the broader concept is why would someone make changes and how is their life going to get better and how do we make it easy to make a change? And so if you think about any change you made in your life, if you set yourself up for success, you're going to be far more likely to be able to make that change. If you're suffering from trauma, depression, anxiety, you're not going to be able to just stop drinking without help. You need help treating the anxiety, depression, trauma, and also treatment for the alcohol use disorder. That's not because you're weak, that's not a failing. And if you're not able to sort of meet your goals with whatever intervention and support you're getting, that's a sign that that support is not enough for you. So really shifting from this idea that the person is failing to thinking the system, the treatment, the resources are failing, and how do we adjust that instead of blaming the human being who's suffering?

Mel Robbins (43:24):

I just want to thank you. I think it's very refreshing because so much that you listen to on this topic is don't drink. And I kind of expected Dr. Wakeman you to come in here and just take your fist and slam it on the counter and talk about the lives ruined from alcohol. And you might have that experience in your family as you're listening to us. But what she's saying is you have to understand how somebody is feeling and what's actually going to work to get them to want to see that something else is possible for them. So Dr. Wakeman, I have another question for you. A lot of parents writing in about college age kids and binge drinking and 20 somethings that are also drinking too much. Do you have any scripts or lead in sentences to even broach this topic? Because I feel like most of us don't know how to even bring it up.

Dr. Wakeman (44:19):

Yeah, I think ideally it starts young. Ideally, you're having these conversations very early on with kids in a pragmatic, not in a scare tactic way. So we know that things like, dare this, I'm going to scare you into this is what alcohol and drugs do to your brain. Actually kids use more drugs after seeing that sort of stuff. It's not helpful. Kids see right through adults when they're sort of all or nothing about things. So having these nuanced conversations of like you're going to be around friends who are drinking really heavy, what do you think about that? What's been your experience? What are some of the worries you might have about that? And talking about the very practical risks that are not necessarily liver failure addiction, which are not going to be resonant for a 19-year-old, but getting into a situation that doesn't feel safe, getting into a sexually vulnerable position with someone doing something that you don't want to do, missing class the next day. So talking about sort of relevant personalized issues that may come up for that kid. And then importantly, making that your child feel safe talking to you. You want them to feel comfortable coming to you about small things so that they'll come to you about big things. And so you can share all of this in a way that doesn't feel judgmental, doesn't feel accusatory, really opens the door to ongoing conversations instead of making someone feel like they're being blamed or judged by their parent.

Mel Robbins (45:28):

So for somebody that's never even broached this and alcohol is in the family, this is a thing that's really triggering for all of us. Is there a way to break down the conversation just so that the person listening can take from us or take from this conversation, alright, I'm going to express my feelings, then I'm going to ask them about theirs. Because most people get really defensive when you talk about this and then that just shuts down the conversation.

Dr. Wakeman (45:58):

Totally. Well, first of all, it is not too late. You have not fails. None of us are perfect in this. These are hard conversations and we haven't learned how to do it. So it is never too late. It doesn't matter how many times you've ignored it or had an unproductive conversation. I think in that moment probably the most important things you can communicate are, I love you. I'm worried about you. I'm here for you. I know that treatment works. This is how I can support you. So many things. You're sort of talking about yourself, you're talking about your care and concern. You're rooting everything and how much you love this person and you're offering to be a partner and helping them find support and treatment. And it may not happen that day, it usually doesn't. So often the journey to recovery is their circuitous journey of a thousand small steps. It's very rarely that dramatic leap we see on tv. And so to not give up hope and to know that those small moments of kindness and support actually are progress and are part of the person's journey to ultimately getting well,

Mel Robbins (46:56):

If you're the one that really just wants to cut back,

Dr. Wakeman (46:59):

So if you're listening and you want to cut back on alcohol use, I think first figure out your why.

Mel Robbins (47:03):

How do you help them figure out their why as it relates to their relationship with alcohol?

Dr. Wakeman (47:08):

Yeah. I think understanding first, how alcohol fits in your life. And so people can do this at home by just keeping a drinking diary. So even just jotting down on your phone or in a notebook when you want to have a drink, sort of what activities you associate with drinking when you do have a drink, how many drinks you have over what time periods. It's sort of keeping a food journal where it actually just makes you more mindful of like, oh, I'm triggered to want to snack on this thing because I'm feeling really upset about this fight I just had. You can identify that with alcohol too. You mentioned this earlier. I'm really stressed out at the end of the day, and so I come home and want to reach for a glass of wine. Understanding how alcohol fits in your life is an important first step.

(47:45):

And then figuring out what are the goals you're working on right now. And that could change over time, but again, if your goal is something related to fitness or wellness or health, you may find after learning more about alcohol and the role it plays in your life, that actually you want to change how much you're drinking. And so then you have your why. My why is I'm training for a marathon and I've found that when I drink, I have a hard time waking up and going for my long runs, and so I'm only going to drink on this day and I'm going to keep it to this amount. So it's very specific and that's important for behavior change. If you make this broad sort of general goal of I'm never going to drink again because alcohol's bad, you're probably not going to do it because hard and it doesn't really relate to you as a human. So as much as you can make it specific, measurable, time bound. So it's like the next three weeks I'm going to try this and then I'm going to reassess. That makes it much easier to actually make change and stick to it over time.

Mel Robbins (48:34):

Well, it's great advice. I feel like so many of us have had that experience where you go to a big wedding and you're like, that's it, I'm never drinking again. I can't do this to myself. And three days later you're going out for somebody's engagement and now you're like, ah, I should just have a glass of wine and you're back in it. And so I think getting very clear about what are your goals, and I'm willing to bet if you write down your goals that you're going to see that alcohol is not helping any of them.

Dr. Wakeman (49:03):

Exactly. And there's lots of tips out there, but you want to make it as easy as possible for yourself. So if your goal is to cut back on drinking, you don't want to have a week where you're packed with going out to happy hour with people. You want to really set yourself up for success. So organize your social activities around non-drinking activities. Come up with a plan. If you're going to be in a situation where you would normally drink that you're going to have a glass of club soda in your hand. The minute you walk in the door, you're going to have a friend who knows that you're working on this, who's going to be your partner. Setting those intentions, those ideas and tools and tricks ahead of time will make it way easier for you to ultimately reach that goal of cutting back.

Mel Robbins (49:35):

If you don't feel supported by your family or your partner or friends, what advice do you have for people to navigate that?

Dr. Wakeman (49:44):

Great question. I think first, letting people know about your intentions. So sharing what your goal is is really important because people can't support you if they don't know. And if you've always drank a certain way with your partner or your friends and all of a sudden you're not, they're going to be like what's going on? Whereas if you say to them, Hey guys, I know you love me and support Eat Me. I want to share with you that my new goal is to not drink more than one drink a day or only drink on Friday and no more than two drinks or whatever, or not drink at all. And this is my why. I'm doing this because I'm worried about myself or I'm doing this because it feels counterproductive to my health and I really want your support and this is how you can support me.

(50:19):

So then you're really framing it as they get to be a partner with you. You're not criticizing their drinking. Because often people feel then like, oh, I'm a little self-conscious. This person's going to be judging, or they think I'm bad. You're just asking for their help. And so maybe that looks like instead of meeting for drinks, you meet to go to yoga class or you meet to go for a run, or you let the person know why you're going to be ordering a soda water instead of a drink. And so you can be really concrete both for yourself and what those tools look like, but also for the people in your life to signal to them how they can help support you. And sometimes people can't do that. And that happens whenever we make any big change. People may have experienced that if they decided to have a weight loss journey or change their life in some way, that there are people that really fit in our lives for certain points and that can't journey with you through that transformation, and that's sad. But if you find that despite those conversations someone is actually destructive to the change that you want to make and not supportive, then that may be a broader question about the role of that relationship in your life.

Mel Robbins (51:15):

I thought I knew a lot about this topic and it just goes to show you there is always something new you can learn. So I have another question. Dr. Wman, what is your message to someone who is struggling with their relationship to alcohol?

Mel Robbins (52:11):

And for the person who had this conversation shared with them from a family member who's probably concerned about their drinking, what is your message to that person?

Dr. Wakeman (52:22):

It can be really hard to hear this, especially in a society that still stigmatizes alcohol use and alcohol use disorder. I think take this as a message of love. Someone loves you, they care about you. They're sharing their worries and they're there to support you and they want to be a part of this journey to help you live the best life you can possibly live in whatever way that means. And hopefully it'll be a moment to pause and thank and get the support you need to make some changes.

Mel Robbins (52:46):

Well, Dr. Sarah Wakeman, thank you so much for being here with us today. Thank you for the work that you're doing. You really are changing and saving people's lives and we appreciate the time and how much wisdom you poured into us.

Dr. Wakeman (53:00):

Thank you, Mel, for having me. This is a true pleasure and hopefully these words will reach people who are working to better their lives or worried about someone they love.

Mel Robbins (53:07):

And I want to also just make sure that you listening that in case nobody else tells you that, I tell you that I love you and I believe in you. I'll talk to you in a few days and to you, you're here with me on YouTube. I want to be sure to tell you I love you, I believe in you, and I believe in your ability to create a better life. And I hope everything that you learn today makes you feel empowered to do that. So please hit subscribe because that's one way that you can really support me in bringing you this content every single day. And I know you're thinking, what's the next thing that I can watch? Mel, lemme tell you. You're going to want to watch this. Understanding yourself, the number one thing you need to do to live an authentic life. I.