5 Signs You’re Dealing With a Narcissist & How To Protect Yourself


The Mel Robbins Podcast with Dr. Ramani Durvasula


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Narcissism is on the rise and you need to learn how to spot it in other people and have tools to protect yourself.

We all know those people who constantly turn a conversation toward themselves, who only call you when they want something, and who have a way of making everything someone else’s fault.

Well, guess what? Turns out narcissism goes far beyond that.

I’m telling you right now, even if you THINK you know what a narcissist is, you need to listen.

I thought I knew, yet I’m still reeling from all my breakthrough moments.

Do you have a narcissist in your life?

Maybe you grew up with one.

Maybe you work with one. 

Maybe you married one.

Maybe you don’t know what the hell a narcissist is!

Pull up a seat at the table with me because class is IN session.

Narcissism is a term that gets thrown around a lot these days, so how do you know if you’re *really* dealing with a narcissist?

You have been blowing up my email and DMs about this topic, so Dr. Ramani Durvasula is here to answer your questions.

She’s the world’s leading expert on narcissism and someone I’ve followed and admired for years. I love how she breaks down the topic of narcissism in a way that’s understandable, simple, and packed with tools you can apply the second you learn them.

Listen in as she shines a light on the REAL definition of a narcissist and the 5 warning signs you need to know if you’re dealing with one.

This topic is so juicy – and so surprising – that you’re going to be shocked by what you learn. One part in particular will change how you approach narcissists in your life from this day forward.

That’s exactly what happened to me. I have somebody in my life, a very prominent somebody, who absolutely displays narcissistic tendencies, and I have spent years in therapy dealing with it. So I actually got out of my chair and hugged Dr. Ramani after everything she taught me and you in this amazing episode!

If you get something out of this episode, or if you have a friend that has struggled with a narcissist in their life, please share this with them.

And if you think a person is a narcissist, don't even bother sharing, because if there's one thing you're going to learn: you don't want to EVER call one out…

That's just one of the many rules you're going to learn to follow in order to protect yourself from narcissistic behavior.

This episode is jam-packed with teachable moments that will leave you seeing the narcissists in your life with 20-20 insight. 

You’ll learn how to not only deal with them but also end this episode with the tools to heal.

And that, my friend, could be the takeaway that changes your life forever.

Xo Mel


  • Where narcissism begins
  • The 5 signs of a narcissist
  • How NOT to raise a narcissist
  • How social media changed the game for narcissists
  • How to tell if YOU are a narcissist 😯
  • What “performative empathy” looks like
  • Whether or not narcissists can change
  • How to handle the narcissist in your life and exact scripts to use with them



  • For Closed Captions: Watch on YouTube and turn on “CC.” For instructions to turn on closed captions, click here.
  • Dr. Brian Little TED Talk: Who are you really? Mentioned by Mel in the episode when discussing personality
  • Dr. Daniel Shaw: Learn more
  • Attachment Theory, John Bowlby: Learn more

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In The Mel Robbins Podcast, Mel takes you behind the scenes in real-time. Every episode is packed with tactical advice, hilarious screwups, compelling conversations, and the tools and inspiration you need to create a better life.