The “Let Them Theory” : A Life-Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About

Episode 70: The Mel Robbins Podcast


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I shared the "Let Them Theory" on social media, and it went CRAZY VIRAL. 15 million views, 11,000 comments. Today, it’s your turn to learn this mindset trick.

I’ve been using this technique for awhile, so I know firsthand how powerful it is.

The "Let Them Theory" is so simple, you’re going to get it immediately.

And I have some great stories and examples to share with you, because there are three very different ways you can use it.

I can bottomline this in one sentence: 

When you "Let Them" do whatever it is that they want to do, it creates more control and emotional peace for you and a better relationship with the people in your life.

Xo Mel 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • 2:30: My overfunctioning anxiety kicked in; until this happened.
  • 6:30: Dr. Amy Johnson gives the best metaphor that explains our need to control.
  • 9:20: Why do we get so upset about what we can’t do a damn thing about?
  • 10:30: These three reasons explain why we try to control. 
  • 11:20: Two reasons why your parents and partners are so controlling.
  • 17:00: There are times like these when the “Let Them” rule does NOT apply.
  • 19:00: How are you supposed to let go when you’re a parent?
  • 24:30: Can you relate to this listener who’s worn down from her expectations?
  • 28:00: Stop making up stories about why people do what they do, and just ask.
  • 32:10: When you’re constantly rescuing people, here’s what you teach them.
  • 35:00: Are you actually in a relationship with a real person, or a vision?
  • 37:15: One way we try to control someone is through jealousy.
  • 40:00: Growing apart from a good friend? Here’s how to handle it.
  • 43:30: It’s not your responsibility to make sure everyone else is never hurt.

Enjoy content like this? Listen to "The Truth About Anxiety and How to Heal It."

Resources and go deeper:

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In The Mel Robbins Podcast, Mel takes you behind the scenes in real-time. Every episode is packed with tactical advice, hilarious screwups, compelling conversations, and the tools and inspiration you need to create a better life.